In this final week of my Unintended Consequences series, I highlight the importance of building relationships in the early childhood classroom and compare how they might differ in teacher-led classrooms vs. child-led classrooms.
I think it’s important to note that no matter what type of classroom you teach in, you have the sacred role of fostering a loving relationship with each of your students. The effort you put into knowing your students as individuals–their interests and dislikes, who is in their family, their culture and heritage–will make a tremendous difference in how at ease they feel in your classroom. Strong relationships with students and families are critical no matter what!
During my first few years as a special education preschool teacher, I didn’t realize how important relationship-building with my students was. I knew lots about their disabilities, and for my particularly difficult students, I knew plenty about their current likes because we leveraged those things as reinforcements. Through IEP meetings, I knew one or both parents to some degree. But most of my students rode the bus to school, so I didn’t have daily interactions with their families and knew very little about their home life. Over the course of the school day, I was trying so hard to keep my head above water with this whole new-to-me teaching thing that I really didn’t get to know my students on a deep level.
Later, as a more seasoned teacher, I found myself more able to focus on relationships. I love getting to know the ins and outs of my students. At the beginning of the year, I always have them tell me who is in their family, and I make an effort to greet their siblings by name any time I happen to see them. I show interest in their parents’ occupations and take opportunities to let them know how important their mom’s and dad’s jobs are to our community. I know what pets they have and how far they have to travel to visit their grandparents. I know what their favorite TV programs are, and 90% of what I know about Minecraft came from listening to preschoolers tell me all about it 😀. I know who their friends outside of school are and how many stuffed animals they take to bed with them each night. I know if they play soccer, take dance, or go to church.
I know. And knowing allows me to reach each individual child on a level that shows them that I care about who they are and what they love. The personal connection that I strive to have with each and every student is the foundation of my work as a teacher.
BUT…
As wonderful as all of that knowing is, I feel like the teacher-led program I currently work holds me back in my relationships with my students. Yes, they know I love them. But the clearly defined roles we have at school–me, the instructor and they, the obeyer–drive a wedge that makes it near-impossible for me to show the full trust that I have in them as learners.
Teacher-led programs put teachers into the role of the controller of all things. They control how long each task lasts. They control where and how the kids sit. They control when kids talk and when they listen. They control what they do with toys. They control what their art looks like.
They spend an enormous part of their day handing out directions and expecting compliance. When compliance doesn’t happen, they employ behavior systems and leverage reinforcements or take away play. Their intent is not to be the tyrant of the classroom, but when there are schedules to keep and lesson plans to move through, it’s their job to take the reins and run the show.
Counter that with child-led classrooms, where teachers trust the children to be the driving force behind their own learning. They are less concerned with arbitrary compliance and more concerned with children having the time they need to fully engage with whatever is at hand. They have time to observe and gain insight into each student’s strengths and weaknesses. They have flexibility with the kinds of support they offer. They encourage discovery and exploration, even when it includes messes and noise and takes longer than anticipated.
Teachers both types of models can build strong, wonderful relationships with their students. But only one offers full trust to the students and says “You know what you’re doing and what you need. I’m here to guide and support.”
There is nothing more wonderful than seeing a child discover something on their own because they were given proper time and space….and nothing more frustrating that seeing a child resist an activity that they don’t connect with, but is forced upon them because it’s in the lesson plan. Which moment would you rather experience on a daily basis?